So I’ve spent the last month looking for Houses. Nothing special, nothing extravagant. I came from a 1700sqft ranch with 3 bed, 2 full bath and a car port, small town, sold for about 215, and I got 135 take home after everything was paid off.
I had to expand my budget to 350 up here just to sniff houses that aren’t in absolute disrepair on the inside and would require 50+ in reno, are 1.5 bth, or someone watched a couple episodes of Flippers and did a shittier job of “updating” the inside by putting the same cheap shitty grey vinyl flooring in several rooms.
There was 1 house I really liked, good area, open floor plan and a great basement. Downside was all the first floor carpet needed to be tore up especially since there were large stains in one of the bedrooms and it was poorly installed so was already buckled and loose, and there were cheap vinyl tiles in the foyer and kitchen that showed their wear and had to be removed. Just under 1700sq ft listed at 340 and went over asking the day it hit the market.
Another house, looked move in ready. 1500sq ft, with a half finished basement. Went to look at it…the house is claustrophobic, and the carpet needs to be pulled up also because of the terrible condition. The owners “finished” the basement by putting large vinyl tiles down themselves…which have already buckled and are about an inch off the ground in several places. They have a back patio which is about big enough for a Weber kettle grill and a camp chair. They’re asking 336, claimed they already had an offer when I was looking at it but I noped outta that shit. That was a week ago and it’s still on the market so either they were using BS tactics or the “offer” was for what the house was actually worth and they refused it. It’s also the smallest house in a large neighborhood.
the same cheap shitty grey vinyl flooring
I have never in my life hated a house product more than this shit - and I grew up in the ‘70s surrounded by the fake wood paneling and the nasty shag carpets. I don’t even understand what that flooring is trying to emulate. No real wood is light gray and comes in 6" x 3’ planks.
I’ve been renovating a house since last year that has that shit in the living room and I’ve intentionally left it uncovered the whole time in the hopes of fucking it up so bad that I’m forced to replace it, but unfortunately it is extremely durable.
Why did your house sell for 215?
Because that’s what houses in that area were going for on the high end. Cost of living where I am now is redonk
Who’s gonna buy it? Prince?
you might need a time machine for that
Him or a Vikings fan.
Who? The former artist formerly known as?
The cabinets aren’t so bad, paint isn’t difficult. But the floors and countertops. Oof.
See I’m the opposite. The cabinets are an absolute eyesore, but the floor looks awesome. I would love to have a floor like that
It just looks like the snuffleupagus had diarrhea around the place…
This is PhotoShopped, but…
If it were real, the problem isn’t the purple. It’s the white.
Oh shit, I forgot I had flux turned on, so I was like “that’s an old fashioned brown, but not too garish”. There’s a lot of blue in that brown…
I would like my house in dark mode please
LOL fuck flippers. Making living expensive for everyone else.
No one did this for a flip. This reads as someone who really likes purple. That floor and countertop cost extra and someone flipping wouldn’t have spent the money on that. A flip would be boring brown or gray with the cheapest materials and crappy workmanship.
Also their ‘renovations’ usually just need to be taken out or repaired to normal by the buyer as they rarely use proper licensed tradesmen, or check to see if what they’re doing is even sound for the building. I’ve seen a center brick fireplace, clearly holding up the roof, just ripped out and plastered over.
This made my European building standard brain spasm… how could one… that’s outright negligence…
It’s grape flavored.
I’m gonna tie you to the radiator Ggggrrraaape you!
For reference: https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=tmrDypTB_Y0
I stand by that I fucking love that kitchen. Add a ton of modernist architecture that makes you think and a yard I’m allowed to grow food and replace the grass with mint and I’m in.
am i high or are those cabinets just like really short? or does this kitchen have like 10ft high ceilings.
yeah this goes hard, can’t lie
Only two people in this demographic:
A 71 Hemi Cuda is my dream car, but there is no way I’d have that kitchen
You have to be plumb crazy to own a real cuda, and that kitchen is a plumb crazy qualifier. Come back when you’re ready to fully commit to the complete cuda club experience. Maybe one day…
15k on what exactly? They just painted the wooden doors of the old units purple.
Seems legit to me. Pretty much any kitchen reno is hard to keep under $10k. It adds up soo fast
I’m in the middle of building new cabinets for my kitchen and I was freaking out over what the wood I’m using costs (about $25 for each 8’x1’ plank) until I priced even the shittiest prebuilt cabinets at Lowe’s. Holy fuck those things are expensive, and they’re just shitty pressboard.
I see no before picture so I assume the marble flooring and countertops. Plus the mosaic backsplash tiling maybe? And it’s entirely possible those are brand new cupboards.
Not sure of that is real marble, but here’s a random PSA anyway:
Don’t put marble anywhere close to anywhere you might spill anything remotely resembling acid. You can literally etch that stuff with OJ.
Oh my god I looked more closely. I think that’s acrylic resin. Ew.
On the drugs that convinced them to do this.
When did Pimp my Ride start doing houses?
410 days ago, + or - 6 days
lol, actually laughing. Thanks for that!
I’m getting a Costco meets Paisley Park vibe.
I know several people who would pick this house just for the kitchen…
I’m absolutely one of them. It’s a bit wacky, but not non functionally so. My taste leans simple but bold
Is it wrong that I kinda fuck with it?
If you’re wrong I don’t want to be right
How did you get introduced to the cast of Real Housewives of Salt Lake City?
I guess I fucked one for 7 years? But she never told me she was a reality TV star!
Diamond Now. For when you need class … today.
My question isn’t their taste, but their budget. How the hell did that kitchen cost $15,000? Even if they had to replace everything I couldn’t see it being more than $5k.
Is the floor also marble?
You are living in the past.
No, I just do a lot of stuff myself. I could do better than that kitchen for $5,000 with some smart shopping and elbow grease. I redid the floors, bathroom, and kitchen in an 1860s cabin for that much back in 2013
Yes, 2013 is indeed the past. Inflation, shrinkflation, and price gouging has driven prices up and quality down
I’m not old you’re old.
2013 was over a decade ago we’ve went through both a housing crisis and record levels of inflation since then.
Yeah that’s why I can only do the kitchen for five grand and not the whole house
X
15k is a very normal price to flip an entire kitchen. Not even counting the appliances. Just the flooring and cabinets.
Yeah it seems like I can’t get anything done for < 6000 anymore. I can’t imagine a whole kitchen costing only 15
If you keep all the existing appliances and build your own cabinets while already having all the requisite tools and do absolutely everything yourself, it’s doable, but tight. Shits expensive these days.
Building your own cabinets will be monumentally more expensive unless you are an experienced cabinet maker with a bunch of tools already.
2-3k to paint existing cabinets, new hardware 4-5k epoxy floor and countertops 4-5k new appliances 3-4k left for drywall, paint, lighting, trim, framing, hvac, plumbing, electrical.
She could have gotten more for less but not by much when you are hiring it all out. Doesn’t even look like she touched the tile backsplash, which would be 1-2k more.
I remodel kitchens in the midwest, and we would charge a lot more than that for this size kitchen. She clearly didn’t spend for a designer, though.
Damn, I should get into home improvement. I always did all that myself which is why my estimate was so low.
Plus that doesn’t look like a terribly expensive stove or sink.
2-3K for paint?
You’re getting reamed by your painter if he’s charging you 2-3k for a small room like that.
I think that’s an average professional price for my area, but there’s always a cheaper painter. Spraying cabinets the right way is a big nasty job. Thankfully we don’t do it much anymore.
I finish my own cabinets, so maybe I’m just out of touch. But materials alone is only like a hundred bucks or so, and a company already owns the compressor and paint sprayer. I don’t think I’d pay more than 1k, it better be fucking Van Gogh painting my cabinets for anything over that.
Wanna redo my kitchen for $15k? I’ll hire you right now, and pay half up front.
Lol when was the last time you priced out a kitchen remodel? 5k would maybe get you the cabinets
It was admittedly a while ago, but pre-built cabinets are like $200 a piece so there’s maybe $1500 worth of cabinets there. It’s not a huge kitchen.
Unless these idiots bought custom made cabinets, didn’t bother doing anything to the left of the stove, and then painted them a horrible color.
Those are definitely custom to fit that space and accommodate the sink/hood. Though why there’s such a big stile against the wall left of the range is beyond me. Shit planning and taste.
If there was an outlet there, I could see that spot being meant for an appliance like a microwave or something. But I can only see one wall outlet in the entire kitchen.
I don’t think following code was part of their design.
With custom cabinets they would be able to fill that gap on the left and also use smaller filler for the bottom cabinet left of the range. For pre-fabricated cabinets they usually only have size increments of 3" so you end up with big fillers. The sink area upper cabinets look like a standard size and the hood cabinet is actually wider than the hood so it definitely wasn’t made custom to this hood.
Custom cabinets and they couldn’t even get the top doors to match the bottom
How the hell did that kitchen cost $15,000?
The floor is also marble. And purple marble.
To be fair it also looks like a photoshop job.
Man, I love me some purple/violet, but this just ain’t it
Although I don’t hate the floor. With something complimentary going on it would actually look good imo
I LOVE the floor tbh but yeah maybe just like purple highlights on the cabinets instead of the entire thing. It’s giving me circa 2005 decorating my sims 2 home.
That floor would pair well with an uncontrolled structure fire.
That’s probably fair. I’m not an interior designer.