• Flying Squid@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    19
    arrow-down
    8
    ·
    5 months ago

    They’re baby pictures. We’re not talking about something erotic here. Naked babies are not some sort of scandalous thing. In most cultures, they’re normal.

    • KillingTimeItself@lemmy.dbzer0.com
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      14
      arrow-down
      8
      ·
      edit-2
      5 months ago

      i didn’t take them and i didn’t consent to them existing either. Neither did i consent to them being shown to anybody.

      Naked humans are also normal, yet we still wear clothes. babies included, weirdly enough.

      At what point does “naked baby photos” turn to “naked children photos” is my question.

      how about this. You can have your naked baby photos, you just also have to be in the photo and naked as well.

      • Flying Squid@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        8
        arrow-down
        10
        ·
        edit-2
        5 months ago

        i didn’t take them and i didn’t consent to them existing either. Neither did i consent to them being shown to anybody.

        Based on that reasoning, I should not show anyone any photo of my child until they were old enough to consent to them being taken.

        You can have your naked baby photos, you just also have to be in the photo and naked as well.

        I’m not embarrassed by my body and if that’s what her partner really wants to see, I don’t care.

        • Ilovethebomb@lemm.ee
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          17
          arrow-down
          6
          ·
          5 months ago

          Based on that reasoning, I should not show anyone any photo of my child until they were old enough to consent to them being taken.

          This is actually solid advice, especially as far as social media is concerned.

          • Flying Squid@lemmy.world
            link
            fedilink
            arrow-up
            8
            arrow-down
            7
            ·
            5 months ago

            We’re not talking about social media, we’re talking about the significant other of my child. Or even relatives. I didn’t get my daughter’s permission to take her photo when she was a baby, so I shouldn’t have sent a photo to my father on the other side of the country based on this reasoning.

            • nomous@lemmy.world
              link
              fedilink
              arrow-up
              9
              arrow-down
              2
              ·
              5 months ago

              You’re (wisely) backpeddling now but you said:

              used to torture children in front of their serious romantic partners brought home for the first time.

              Things were different when we were kids. It’s a fucked up thing to psychologically abuse your (presumably) teenage kids like that and objectively people know that. (Your daughters) consent in the subject is the only thing that matters. The only reason anyone is giving you a pass is because you’re FlyingSquid, but maybe leave those pictures in the closet until closer to the wedding.

              • Flying Squid@lemmy.world
                link
                fedilink
                arrow-up
                6
                arrow-down
                9
                ·
                5 months ago

                Oh please. It’s not psychological abuse. It’s “torture” the same way telling the story about the time they told a lady in the checkout line, “I came out of my mommy’s bagina!” when they were three to an adult child’s partner is torture.

                You show me an example of anyone suffering PTSD because their parents showed their partner baby pictures.

                • Emerald@lemmy.world
                  link
                  fedilink
                  arrow-up
                  6
                  arrow-down
                  1
                  ·
                  5 months ago

                  You show me an example of anyone suffering PTSD because their parents showed their partner baby pictures.

                  Ah yes, because everything is ethical as long as the other party doesn’t develop a mental illness because of it

                  • Flying Squid@lemmy.world
                    link
                    fedilink
                    arrow-up
                    2
                    arrow-down
                    5
                    ·
                    5 months ago

                    The claim was it caused trauma. That is something that is evidence-based. You are changing the subject.

                • nomous@lemmy.world
                  link
                  fedilink
                  arrow-up
                  5
                  arrow-down
                  2
                  ·
                  edit-2
                  5 months ago

                  Yeah saving it for their long term partners (if you have to) is probably a better idea than showing them during the first meeting.

                  And please don’t dismiss other peoples trauma because you didn’t experience it personally, childhood trauma takes many different forms, some we’re only just becoming aware of.

                  • Flying Squid@lemmy.world
                    link
                    fedilink
                    arrow-up
                    2
                    arrow-down
                    7
                    ·
                    5 months ago

                    I didn’t dismiss anyone’s trauma, I’m asking if that has ever resulted in anyone’s trauma, a parent showing their adult child’s partner a picture of them naked as a baby.

                    I mean if nothing else, not as a “torture,” showing the partner the first couple of pictures of the kid as a baby should be acceptable to people just as a “this is what they looked like when it all began” and they don’t come out with clothes on. They also are unable to understand the concept of consent, let alone give it.

                    I would also suggest that if that did cause someone trauma, it would be because the parent was aware this sort of thing would upset their child to that level and did it anyway. I think most parents wouldn’t actually show the pictures if they knew it would cause the child real psychological pain, because that isn’t the point in doing it. It’s usually a form of good-natured ribbing, not malicious.

                • KillingTimeItself@lemmy.dbzer0.com
                  link
                  fedilink
                  English
                  arrow-up
                  3
                  arrow-down
                  1
                  ·
                  5 months ago

                  You show me an example of anyone suffering PTSD because their parents showed their partner baby pictures.

                  i literally provided myself as an example in this, i quite literally said that i would consider it a violation of privacy, and no that’s not PTSD, but PTSD is the extreme end of things here. We aren’t just talking about PTSD.

                  • Flying Squid@lemmy.world
                    link
                    fedilink
                    arrow-up
                    3
                    arrow-down
                    2
                    ·
                    edit-2
                    5 months ago

                    You claiming that it would give you PTSD is not evidence that anyone has suffered or is suffering from PTSD because of it. That’s just you making an assumption about a situation you’ve apparently never actually faced.

                  • Ilovethebomb@lemm.ee
                    link
                    fedilink
                    arrow-up
                    2
                    ·
                    5 months ago

                    I’ve said the same thing myself in other replies to them, it’s incredibly slimy how hard they’re trying to justify this.

                    Definitely wouldn’t leave them alone around children.

        • KillingTimeItself@lemmy.dbzer0.com
          link
          fedilink
          English
          arrow-up
          3
          arrow-down
          1
          ·
          5 months ago

          Based on that reasoning, I should not show anyone any photo of my child until they were old enough to consent to them being taken.

          based on that reasoning i shouldnt expose my child to the visual perception of other people who exist outside in the chance that one of them non consensually perceives my child.

          You wouldn’t expose your child naked in public, why would you expose them naked on picture?

          I’m not embarrassed by my body and if that’s what her partner really wants to see, I don’t care.

          that’s great, the implication there is that you’re still showing it to other people, and if we’re talking family and friends, i don’t know many people that would want that.

          • Flying Squid@lemmy.world
            link
            fedilink
            arrow-up
            2
            arrow-down
            2
            ·
            5 months ago

            You wouldn’t expose your child naked in public,

            How exactly do you think someone changes a diaper at a park?

            • KillingTimeItself@lemmy.dbzer0.com
              link
              fedilink
              English
              arrow-up
              3
              arrow-down
              1
              ·
              5 months ago

              i mean, most people use bathrooms. Considering that human waste is literally a biohazard, i feel like doing anything else would be quite rude at best, and arguably a crime at worst.

              • Flying Squid@lemmy.world
                link
                fedilink
                arrow-up
                2
                arrow-down
                2
                ·
                edit-2
                5 months ago

                So you acknowledge that I would, in fact, expose my child naked in public. And with good reason. And everyone could see her genitalia when I did.

                Edit: Oh, sorry, misread. You think you can always make it to a bathroom? You have never had a baby.

                • Dasus@lemmy.world
                  link
                  fedilink
                  arrow-up
                  3
                  arrow-down
                  1
                  ·
                  5 months ago

                  I might note here as a Finn that this prudishness concerning the naked human body seems very American.

                  You’re not allowed to go to a public sauna in your swimming wear here. And if you’re a dad and have a small daughter, you’re obviously going to have her in the men’s changing room. And when I was a kid, I was in the women’s changing room with my mom.

                  Even at parties it’s not uncommon to have a mixed-gender sauna where everyone is naked. I’d say most commonly it’s women wearing a towel and men wearing nothing, or if it’s in a sauna near a beach/lake then people will have their swimwear on most times.

                  Still, just being naked isn’t considered sexual in any way. You can even see the non-sexual nature for about 50% of the people who are naked. (Vis-a-vis their lack of visible arousal.)

                  • Flying Squid@lemmy.world
                    link
                    fedilink
                    arrow-up
                    2
                    arrow-down
                    2
                    ·
                    5 months ago

                    I was so confused by their comment that I totally misread it. Not only are they saying that most people wouldn’t change a baby’s diaper in public, but that it isn’t necessary sometimes. Like there’s always a place to do it discreetly when they’ve just had an explosion?

                • KillingTimeItself@lemmy.dbzer0.com
                  link
                  fedilink
                  English
                  arrow-up
                  2
                  ·
                  edit-2
                  5 months ago

                  hence why i said rude at best, because yknow, human fecal matter has never been known to cause disease and sickness in other humans. Let alone what kind of sanitary problems that would cause in most places.

                  Im sure people carry kit with them, but shit happens (literally) and i would certainly want to be in a bathroom rather than not be in one, because that way it’s atleast contextually contained and expected. Also do you not have a car? That would certainly explain some of this.

                  • Flying Squid@lemmy.world
                    link
                    fedilink
                    arrow-up
                    1
                    arrow-down
                    1
                    ·
                    5 months ago

                    It’s rude to change a baby’s diaper in public?

                    Is it rude to breast feed in public as well?

                    You have not ever had a baby if you think you can get to a bathroom or a car every time before an emergency happens.

                    And you not knowing what it’s like to take care of a baby explains a lot.

    • Ilovethebomb@lemm.ee
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      4
      ·
      5 months ago

      Taking photos of naked children isn’t, and shouldn’t, be normal in any culture I’m familiar with, and you definitely shouldn’t be showing them to anyone.

      • Flying Squid@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        2
        arrow-down
        5
        ·
        5 months ago

        Well you should get familiar with Finnish culture and then start berating the Finnish guy who chimed in and said it was totally normal.

        You know what an immoral, shithole country Finland is though.

          • Flying Squid@lemmy.world
            link
            fedilink
            arrow-up
            2
            arrow-down
            4
            ·
            5 months ago

            It’s not my fault that you reply to all of my comments and don’t bother reading other people’s. It’s right there for you to read.

            When are you going to contact lemmy.world admin to have me reported to the authorities for child abuse and the possession of child pornography?

    • x4740N@lemm.ee
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      3
      arrow-down
      2
      ·
      5 months ago

      DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND WHAT CONSENT IS

      YOU LEARN IT AT SCHOOL, ITS VERY IMPORTANT