primscha

I got my first ex lol.

It’s alright— it was a relationship where we both understood the feelings are new and we’re both inexperienced, but in retrospect all communication fell from there lol. Aaand I think it’s still falling.

So. (ᵒ ᵕ ᵒ٥)ゞ Let’s see how much of it can actually be settled…

Otherwise life has been a piece of shit because of burnout. So much is happening around me that I know I’m succeeding at, but I’m having a hard time acknowledging my success. The fear and exhaustion is seeping in. I’m hoping I can recover soon! …Because a lot feels like it’s at stake. (☍◡⁰)

Good luck to everyone 🫡

Going back to the dorms on Friday. It’s a yay/nay situation. Love my friends there. Hate the amount of the work that has to get done. But gotta think on the positive end to keep me going. (Or just… think less to make it easier on the mind lol.)

Today I went to an awesome local coffee shop/bookstore. It’s so beautifully decorated with unique displays and niche items. It captured a very cottage core theme while also having a surprisingly wide variety of books. God I’m gonna miss that place. I really want to go back. Has everything I want in a bookstore… There’s a whole bookshelf filled with architecture and graphic design books I want to get.

Then I got to go to this cute little park/outlet. I’m not sure how to describe it— it’s a small area with a treehouse playground that’s walled off. And I got to see a fire show of sorts. It’s been a fun, exhausting day. Nice way to end my summer break.

No problem! Glad I could help. ⌯’▾’⌯

I know this post is a couple days old but… Thought I’d give it a shot.

Honestly, I just try not to think about my emotional state in the moment. As long as I acknowledge the negative feeling and let said feeling remain as a feeling— not turning it into an articulated thought— and go about my day anyway, the emotions start to subside. Let your body act, but refrain from mulling over the act you’re about to make.

It takes practice to not judge the emotion, but once you get the hang of it I’d say it’s hard to stop.

I find that most of the time my emotions become unbearable is because I begin to rationalize them. (And to attempt rationalizing an emotion is inherently an irrational act.) Does that make sense?

Another way I like to think about it is, don’t intellectualize your faith into doubt without understanding that you can intellectualize your doubt into faith.

Sorry, I know it’s convoluted. I can try providing an example of my experience with this if you’d like. Overall it is about mindfulness and patience with yourself. But first, it’s going to be about having a hell of a lot of patience. Hope this helps.