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Cake day: July 7th, 2023

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  • Voroxpete@sh.itjust.workstohmmm@lemmy.worldHmmm
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    2 days ago

    It should go without saying, but unfortunately there’s a lot in the kink space that should go without saying, but still has to be said, over and and over, because a lot of people come into the scene via entry points like 50 Shades that are almost antithetical to the idea of safe consensual kink.

    Also, fair warning, the “padding” on most padded cuffs won’t do shit to stop them from digging in. Fabric compresses against metal, with the result that you still have an unyielding and relatively small point of contact. A good safe bondage knot will spread the point of restraint across several inches of skin, so the pressure at any one point is minimal.

    Shibari You Can Use has some excellent guides to safe restraint, if you want to learn more.


  • Voroxpete@sh.itjust.workstohmmm@lemmy.worldHmmm
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    2 days ago

    Only if your sub is cool with it, but they need to know going in that either option is likely to chafe and dig into the sensitive skin around their wrists, possibly even causing bleeding depending on how much they strain against them. Definitely not recommended for a first time if you don’t know what your own responses to stimuli are likely to be.

    Much better to use a soft hemp rope, around a quarter inch thick or more, and make sure you’re binding with safe knots. You can’t just go in with any old naval knot or whatever; there are specific bindings that are safe for use on people; look them up. Always check your bindings to ensure a safe amount of slack (you should be able to easily slide a finger around any part of the wrist or ankle for proper circulation) and always make sure you have a set of EMT clothing shears handy in case something goes wrong. No, kitchen scissors are not good enough; EMT shears have serration, and specially shaped blades, in order to cut through heavy fabric or bindings easily.

    Also please don’t use duct tape, there’s literally no way to have it bind but also have sufficient slack. You will impede circulation. Just a terrible idea.











  • Absolutely. A lot of the time the biggest difficulty with researching something is not even knowing the right terms to search for. Asking a few questions can give you a starting point to know where and how to look.

    And the thing is, I personally hate asking questions on forums and the like. I can probably count on one hand the number of times I’ve done it. I’m very good at digging up answers by myself, and I generally do work better with essays than I do with conversations. But my experience should not be seen as the default, and people shouldn’t be shit on for trying to learn through community rather than through textbooks.


  • So, when you create a virtual machine in KVM, you have the ability to attach a Spice or VNC display to the VM.

    Unlike running VNC inside the virtual machine, what this does it is runs VNC on the host, at a port that you designate (or a randomly assigned port if you don’t designate) and then you can view that by connecting to the host through VNC. For Spice its exactly the same, except you use something like the Remote Viewer application to connect to it.

    As others have mentioned, the easiest way of handling all of this is with Virtual Machine Manager, which integrates its own Spice console and makes everything happen automagically. You can also install Cockpit with the Cockpit-Machines plugin on the host, which gives you a web interface for controlling virtual machines, just like vmware esxi. The display manager on cockpit is pretty rough at the moment though.

    KVM is a very “build it yourself” virtualization solution. I use it extensively, and I love it, but you’ll need to be prepared for a lot of “Oh, KVM doesn’t do that, that’s handled by this program/library/whatever”. It’s definitely not a user friendly toolkit. If you’re looking for a Workstation Player alternative, you may be better off with something like Virtbox (although do try out Virtual Machine Manager first, it’s really slick and for your use case probably solves all the problems I’ve mentioned). If you’re looking for an esxi alternative, maybe look into Proxmox.


  • I’ve been looking for documentation on this but Google search is now so bad that technical documents are completely hidden behind marketing blurbs or LLM generated rubbish.

    Its honestly tragic that people feel the need to put these disclaimers. “Just google it” was always a shitty response to people asking legitimate questions (some people learn better from conversational interaction rather than just reading an essay), but with the slow death of search engines we’re now experiencing, at this point anyone who yells “Just google it” needs to be ejected into the fucking sun.