I have a fairly functional form of autism, but I sometimes struggle finding balance in points of interest I get enthusiastic about, and nobody really matches my enthusiasm, even though they try. It often feels like rejection, but this post really puts it in perspective for me. I’m not always reasonable/flexible when I’m like that. Thanks for sharing.
(To give an example related to this post; I wouldn’t assault someone for having a different opinion, but I could definitely debate them with a passion that’s a little out of place and not as reasonable as I’d like to believe it is. “Building with concrete blocks? What is even wrong with you, where you never thought proper construction? What do you mean cheap building costs? People who want to build cheap buildings shouldn’t be allowed to build anyway”.
Speaking from my own experiences… (i’m diagnosed with autism and high-IQ)
People seem to read vulnerabilities they cant really place as general mental fucked upness. For example, I struggle when two people talk to me at the same time, or ask me several questions at once. Have a couple of these incidents happen and some people start treating me as if I’m missing a chromosome. I think when people are dealing with something thy know little about, some would rather fill the blanks with ignorance and stereotypes. You could invite them to learn more, but also… meh, their loss.
People who are familiar with autism, or being overloaded on info… they often automatically slow down, ask about my challenges, ect.
I’ve learned some tricks to demand respect though, you can’t expect everyone to be sensible. I have an elaborate vocabulaire, and though I prefer to talk informal, sometimes talking slightly more formal than the person in front of you can keep them on their toes.
Another direction, I also like to deploy, is to just play the dumdum they think I am. It means less expectations, less bullshit. And honestly, nothing is more satisfying when halfway trough the year they find out you know the source material better than they do.
Another thing that has really worked for me is to surround myself with people who are eager to get to know me as an individual. In time this has also helped me grow the confidence to convince or even demand other people to understand how I work even if it originally isn’t there priority.
Hope his helps