Been having a pretty rough time after a psychiatrist suddenly reversed course and refused to supply documentation I need for disability benefits. It definitely feels like a very personal instance of “you’re a useless mouth and should be dead, or at least out of the system where nobody has to think about you”.
Not the best idea but I also read pretty extensively about how bad Australia’s health system is for disabled people. Also lived through two of my grandparents being left to die by it. Also a lot of contact trauma from being on the periphery of the welfare, disability, and poverty rights movements.
So, let’s have a chat. What helps? I usually make it through immediate mental health crises but every episode of suicidal planning ratchets my preparedness up a bit more. I think I need to be more proactive about not getting to that state in the first place.