Meanwhile IVF is north of $25k…
Police ultimately tracked down a “contract” signed by both the runaway parents and one would-be buyer, who was identified by authorities as Cody Martin.
It read: “I Darien Urban and Shalene Ehlers are signing our rights over to Cody Nathaniel Martin of our baby boy for $1,000 on 09/21/2024.
“Disclaimer: Alter signing this there will be no changing yall two’s minds and to never contact again.”
Literally a trailer park boys episode. I can picture what kind of campground this is.
It said they hadn’t even given them the money yet. I’m really hoping they only did it to remove the child from the awful parents, and were planning on going to the authorities in the morning. The man with the plan was heavily intoxicated
That seemed to be the idea. Basically, that baby was saved by a drunk with a heart of gold.
“I’m a man with a plan and the plan is to drink as fast as I can”
Sounds like they just didn’t want the baby. I wonder if this couple even knew that Arkansas has a Safe haven/ Safe surrender thing they could’ve done? For anyone in Arkansas: https://humanservices.arkansas.gov/learn-about-programs/programs-for-children-families/arkansas-safe-haven/#q-what-is-safe-haven
Honestly though, the baby is better off without those parents. I’m of the mind that we shouldn’t shame / prosecute them, since that would actually discourage other horrible parents like this from giving up their babies.
Granted, abortion would be a much better route, but small steps.
How close are those branches of that family tree‽
It ain’t a tree, its a double helix
The möbius strip of bad decisions and family reunions.
I think it’s probably closer to a utility pole
Christmas wreath
Branches???
Was it their baby or someone else’s?
Asking the real questions
A baby’s a baby, pal. You buyin or what?
That’s what I’m saying. Maybe this couple scored the baby at the campground for $500 and some seedy weed and were trying to flip the baby for profit.
You can sell your babies. Just not like that. It only works for rich people wanting to buy a baby.
What can you even do with a baby?
Trade it for beer, duh
Will it blend?
No idea. Afaik it’s just a huge money pit.
Stewed, roasted, baked, or boiled; and I make no doubt that it will equally serve in a fricassee, or a ragout.
And that’s to say nothing of the skin, which will make admirable gloves for ladies, and summer boots for fine gentlemen.
$1000 is a rather modest proposal!
Ragù isn’t French, but nice try.
Ragù is Italian, ragout is in fact French
Sad and horrible things have been done with babies. Don’t go looking for pictures or videos on the internet.
With the father’s history of domestic abuse I just hope this couple doesn’t produce another baby for the purpose of selling it.
Apparently you can paint houses with them, but you’d need a lot more than just one baby
How hard are you throwing these babies???
Speculative investment.
“l’ll give you an idea. Why as a pup, l myself fetched $30,000 on the black market. That was 1954 dollars. Now, for 50 grand, l’ll track him and l’ll find him. And the people that took him, l’ll kick their butts. No extra charge.”
That baby must have eyes like a hammerhead shark.
Good riddance shit parents.
plot twist, the real father is Cyraxx.
Would it be unethical to oblige for the sake of getting the child to safety?
I’m not saying I would do it (I don’t have that kinda cash) but like wouldn’t that be the ethical choice if you could? Save this child from parents who clearly aren’t capable/willing to raise it properly?
With how the police are? You politely decline the offer and call the police while watching the couple from a distance. They’ll likely to arrest you for human trafficking just to pad out the arrest statics.
If I saw these parents, I would have offered to adopt the kid just to get the poor thing away from bad parents.
That’s the story the buyer told. The baby was badly neglected.
I normally feel sus for things. Like, was the buyer trying to eat the baby or something? Even if the buyer initially intentions was bad, I felt like the buyer at the very least got the baby away from bad parents and maybe gave this kid a different path in life.
What kind of beer though?
It’s Arkansas.
Busch Light. I forgot they were too woke. I don’t know what they’ve switched to, I haven’t drank in over a decadeActually might be Busch light, Budweiser is the woke one and most of them don’t realize it’s the same company.
Wouldn’t surprise me in the slightest down here
Bud is woke?
Well Bud Light is, they gave a single can to a trans women like a year and a half ago.
Aha. That’s monstrously woke indeed
North of $25k… And that’s for the first round.
Because here’s the thing, every body is different. At first they go with the “average IVF woman’s” level of hormones to produce as many eggs as possible. Will it work for you? Who knows! They check blood work every week, and then at the end of the cycle they surgically remove anything that looks matures and try to fertilize. Say 12 eggs are retrieved, maybe 7 are successfully fertilized. Then they incubate for a few weeks - maybe 4 make it through and are candidates for surgical implant, (if so, you’re lucky and they’ll try one or two max for implant at a time). Or maybe all of them don’t make it.
But if you don’t have any viable options, well we try for round two with slightly tweaked hormones. Did round two not work? Time for round three with slightly different hormone levels/timing. (We learned so much about your specific body chemistry!)
Even after all of that, say you get a successful implantation - you’re now pregnant. All costs for prenatal care, hospital birth - that’s an add on to the $75k you’ve spent for IVF. And because humans are weird, there’s no guarantee with IVF that you or the baby will survive and be healthy!
Infinite money glitch
Nope, the most amount of kids someone has had is 69, so I’m sure it’s not worth the sub $70k for your entire life
Jesus, buy that woman a kickstand
…and the pro life community is somehow mad here. Weird
Why? Couldn’t they have twins, triplets or more with every pregnancy?
Of course it’s Arkansas
Arkansas: It’s the Alabama of Floridas!
Florida breathes sigh of relief
Why do their faces look like they are about to pop? Is stupid a liquid?