I hit a minke whale in my pickup while driving home one night, just north of Belle Fourche, South Dakota. Son of a bitch breached over a guardrail and flopped down right in front of me before I’d even had a chance to hit the brakes. Hit him square in the blow hole and mangled the whole front end of the truck. The fishy bastard just dusted himself off and fucked off into the night, making them wierd ass whale noises at me the whole time. Ever since that night, I take the long way home.