I have a problem with establishing boundaries.
I’m a private person. That’s very often misinterpreted as being arrogant and feeling superior to others. I’m not, I just wish to be left alone, but people still feel disrespected and it’s tiring to be constantly explaining yourself. And I don’t understand why I have to explain myself constantly.
This very emotional and thankful patient wanted a picture with me and I stupidly agreed. He also wanted my phone number (I gave him a false one) to invite me to have lunch, as he celebrated his 70th birthday. I don’t believe it was sexual or romantic, because he is married, his wife was there when he extended the invitation and took the picture and he also wanted to invite the whole unit.
I acted like this because it was the easiest way to get him to leave the hospital and free the room but also because I didn’t want to cause a scene.
What could I do next time?
My ex-wife had a real discomfort in being in pictures, so I get it.
Not wanting to give out your number to a random man? yeah, don’t need prior experience with anything to know how disconcerting that would be.
How you treat your patients is a personal thing. Some people take an approach that’s very personable, in which they probably wouldn’t see the harm in being taken out to a meal by their happy patient. Your approach is more professional, in which you’re there to care for them, and leave. That’s the way that helps you maintain your emotional well-being, being able to leave work at work. So in the future, I’d frame it in that way. You may acquiesce to taking a picture every so often, but when it comes to anything further, I’d tell them that you keep your professional and private life separate, and thank them for thinking of you.