Why would it ever be remotely acceptable to look through your kid’s phone? One can hardly think of a more serious violation of privacy. Not just for the kid but for all the people the kid communicates with. It should not be socially acceptable to admit that you’ve done this.
If they’re causing problems, address them another way. Take the phone away if you need to, but do not turn your house into North Korea.
This kind of behavoir leads to a normalization of permanent surveillance. Children will accept it as normal that someone goes through their phones and other devices.
And the worst part ist that those parents had a childhood free of any intrusions of their own privacy. If they had been under surveillance in the same fashion they do it to their kids, one could argue that they don’t know any better. In my opinion, marketing and fear mongering and being subjected to religion (i.e. evangelical christianity) play an important role here.
I am so gratful that I (early millennial) have been born and raised at a time where this tracking and surveillance bullshit wasn’t around at all. I estimate my parents would have had a blast when these things were readily availiable.
Because a parent should have the right to monitor their child’s internet exposure just as our parents told us we couldn’t watch R movies or play violent video games…imagine for two seconds she didn’t have innocent pictures of a video game character, but the parent found she was in contact with a groomer and sending pics. Maybe she’s the bad one getting into drugs, or bullying other kids. It’s a parents job to intervene and to help their kid - you can’t do that if you don’t know what’s going on.
How many stories have you heard about cyber-bulling, grooming, or “send me a pic” scams that led to suicide or other terrible outcomes? - way too many.
In a lot of the post-interviews, the parents responses are always something like “I never knew this was happening, my 9 year old Billy was so happy the 20 minutes a day I saw him outside of his room. I never imagined that his ‘online friends’ on 4chanclone77 were telling him to send pics and that he should die everyday.”
For a kid its protection over privacy everyday - same reason that you might want to know if your kid is spending a lot of “extracurricular time” at the teacher’s house.
Once they’re a teen the training wheels slowly come off until they’re not needed, hopefully by 14, after they’ve been taught about the dark side of the world and how to protect themselves from that crap, and know that they can come to me with any problem no matter what, weather they caused it or not, and I’ll help them figure it out.
You got me thinking. I’m planning on having kids in the Future and thought what I would do.
Since my Kids will grow up with all this, I will start teaching them early on what is okay and what not. I guess I will trust them as long as there is no reason not to. Like If a another Parent or a Teacher confronts me about that my child might bully someone I will check their phone but not randomly with no reason. Simply because if I would do this regularly my Child would just delete or hide everything he/she doesn’t want me to see. And I’m not willing to install spyware on my child’s Phone. I would rather launch a “suprise attack” if necessary, not have constant surveillance. And like I said, only if I have really good reasons.
Children need spaces to talk without adults and I hope my Child will come to me when something weird is going on.
I believe that children will grow if you give them space.
If you constantly surveill your children, don’t ever expect them to grow up and develop into mature, healthy adults.
It’s the same like children need free-play time, without their parent telling them what is ok and what is not. Only that way you gather experience, in other words: true knowledge.
Why would it ever be remotely acceptable to look through your kid’s phone? One can hardly think of a more serious violation of privacy. Not just for the kid but for all the people the kid communicates with. It should not be socially acceptable to admit that you’ve done this.
If they’re causing problems, address them another way. Take the phone away if you need to, but do not turn your house into North Korea.
This kind of behavoir leads to a normalization of permanent surveillance. Children will accept it as normal that someone goes through their phones and other devices.
And the worst part ist that those parents had a childhood free of any intrusions of their own privacy. If they had been under surveillance in the same fashion they do it to their kids, one could argue that they don’t know any better. In my opinion, marketing and fear mongering and being subjected to religion (i.e. evangelical christianity) play an important role here.
I am so gratful that I (early millennial) have been born and raised at a time where this tracking and surveillance bullshit wasn’t around at all. I estimate my parents would have had a blast when these things were readily availiable.
Because a parent should have the right to monitor their child’s internet exposure just as our parents told us we couldn’t watch R movies or play violent video games…imagine for two seconds she didn’t have innocent pictures of a video game character, but the parent found she was in contact with a groomer and sending pics. Maybe she’s the bad one getting into drugs, or bullying other kids. It’s a parents job to intervene and to help their kid - you can’t do that if you don’t know what’s going on.
How many stories have you heard about cyber-bulling, grooming, or “send me a pic” scams that led to suicide or other terrible outcomes? - way too many. In a lot of the post-interviews, the parents responses are always something like “I never knew this was happening, my 9 year old Billy was so happy the 20 minutes a day I saw him outside of his room. I never imagined that his ‘online friends’ on 4chanclone77 were telling him to send pics and that he should die everyday.”
For a kid its protection over privacy everyday - same reason that you might want to know if your kid is spending a lot of “extracurricular time” at the teacher’s house.
Once they’re a teen the training wheels slowly come off until they’re not needed, hopefully by 14, after they’ve been taught about the dark side of the world and how to protect themselves from that crap, and know that they can come to me with any problem no matter what, weather they caused it or not, and I’ll help them figure it out.
You got me thinking. I’m planning on having kids in the Future and thought what I would do.
Since my Kids will grow up with all this, I will start teaching them early on what is okay and what not. I guess I will trust them as long as there is no reason not to. Like If a another Parent or a Teacher confronts me about that my child might bully someone I will check their phone but not randomly with no reason. Simply because if I would do this regularly my Child would just delete or hide everything he/she doesn’t want me to see. And I’m not willing to install spyware on my child’s Phone. I would rather launch a “suprise attack” if necessary, not have constant surveillance. And like I said, only if I have really good reasons.
Children need spaces to talk without adults and I hope my Child will come to me when something weird is going on.
I believe that children will grow if you give them space.
If you constantly surveill your children, don’t ever expect them to grow up and develop into mature, healthy adults.
It’s the same like children need free-play time, without their parent telling them what is ok and what is not. Only that way you gather experience, in other words: true knowledge.