my friends tell me stuff like: “No, you can’t be friends with these people!”

when i ask why, they say it’s because they hate me secretly and don’t want me around because i have autism.

when they’re actually being nice to me, then they say “oh yeah, they’re only being nice to you because they pity you. they want to feel good about themselves so they’re nice to the ‘(r-word)’ kid in special ed”.

and it makes me wonder if it’s because they’re looking out for me and they’re either very negative, being truthful and everyone really does see me as “less than human” and are only nice because im autistic, or they’re being mean.