That was me. Used to rank first. Good in dance and sports. Then puberty and poverty happened. Started developing issues with concentration. No friends, no partners. No money to move out, no job as well. Just a stupid degree.
Sounds like it was their fault. A kid isn’t meant to account for anything more complex than the food they eat, and even that’s optional.
Well you could be all those things and never have had the support of anyone but yourself with only comments on your seeming failures and you will still be upset with yourself cause it’s the only one who really matters.
I do think a decade of trying to claw out of a hole of external circumstances is enough to tire anyone out and yet it still will leave you disappointed even when no one is around to call you out on it.
Described exactly my situation. I am so angry with my enviroment. The amount of people who let down my younger self is outrageous. I’m livid as if my past self were my own kid.